The Funny Thing About Phantom Symptoms

Phantom symptoms. The "pregnancy" symptoms you feel and use to justify convincing yourself that you are KU when in the 2ww.

Phantom symptoms, how I loathe and love thee. Loathe because I do actually use them to convince myself that I'm KU. And then I'm not. And that sucks. Because I was soo sure. Phantom symptoms are the salt rubbed in a wound I don't even know exists until I get that BFN. Love because, let's face it, for the seven days I feel them, I am living every second in the most exciting possible tension, deliriously planning my future with my sweet little cooing chubby bundle of soft baby awesomeness.

They are the only part of pregnancy I've gotten to experience yet. And they don't even exist. I'm not going to dwell on how sucktastic that is. Instead, let's look at why phantom symptoms are cracking me up today. Me, on CD3.

I just read a post about peanut butter slices. Kinda weird, right? But then someone responded about peanut butter slices dipped in chocolate and how good that sounded to them.

I considered it. I, the world's biggest chocolate-and-peanut-butter fan, who used to eat one dark chocolate kiss and one scoop of crunchy peanut butter together in one delicious bite.

And the idea made me want to throw up a little. WTF?? Peanut-butter slices dipped in chocolate doesn't sound appealing to me? The very thought makes me feel sick to my stomach? My immediate follow-up thought? ohmygod, maybe I'm pregnant! And then smiling, laughing at my own foolishness, at the idea of imagining pregnancy symptoms while on my period. I mean, if you can't laugh at yourself in this crazy, crazy process, who can you laugh at?

Phantom symptoms, how I love and loathe thee. Even on CD3.