New Post

That's what you click on to write a new post. New Post.

And that's what this is. I thought it particularly fitting considering my last post.

This is a new post. With a new attitude. A new outlook. And some new updates. And significantly less whining. Thank God. I wanted to kick my own ass, I can't imagine it was much fun to read.

I feel better. Sooo much better. I've slept really well the last two nights and feel rested and strong again. Not only physically strong (which I do--much of my discomfort, which was probably contributing to my sleeplessness, has subsided), but mentally strong, too. I no longer feel like I'm running on fumes. It's amazing what a difference that makes!

We had our 38-week appointment yesterday, and there's a TEENY TINY bit of PROGRESS! The last two appointments I've been just a fingertip dilated (read: not really dilated at all) with zero effacement. Not that I wanted early progress, but considering phase 1 of my plan dictates that I go into labor on my own, I was starting to get a little antsy. Yesterday I was 1 cm dilated and 30% effaced. Yeah, it's just a little progress, but it gives me hope that all that discomfort I've been feeling has actually been doing something. It also puts me about where I was with baby girl at 39 weeks, and I went into labor on my own with her, so it renews my hope and confidence that my body will do just what it is supposed to do, when it's supposed to do it. (In less-measurable progress, my boobs are once again filling up. They are warm to the touch and bouncy and I have cleavage again. Hello, milk!)

Our to-do list has slowly but surely been dominated. There are still a few lingering tasks (finish off organizing the nursery, pack our hospital bag), but the big things that were hanging over us (new pump parts, installing the carseat, etc.) have been done.

I only have one more week of work after this. The end is in sight.

I'm not swelling. My blood pressure is great.

And I'm once again reminded how thrilling this end game is. Yes, it's hard. It hurts. It's exhausting. It's emotionally unstable. But damn, how EXCITING to know that at any point between rightthissecond and two weeks from now, I'll start feeling contractions. I'll think for the second time in my life (for the first time), "Hmmm . . . is this it?"

And no matter what, within the next two weeks, Dos will be here in my arms.